Why it bothers so much after a certain period of time?

I love someone,and i can pretty well deal with it..but, am not into a relationship coz m pathetically bad in continuing with the same! Its as simple as that! Period!
Love and Relationship! Two sides of the same coin? maybe yes! maybe no! or two diverse versions that binds two individuals together? Dealing with the former seems easier - a kiss,a heartbeat skipped,holding hands,walking down the seashore,walking under the moon,love making-on and off bed,on the terrace,balcony,beach house,open air..waking up next to someone..all these without any baggage,without any expectations,apprehensions!

Dealing with the latter seems tough after the initial likeness and penchant for each other seems delusional after a point of time! A face seems unattractive after a certain time, a body seems monotonous after a period of continuous sex for successive days, the never ending endless talks seems boring after a point, there's seems to be lack of words, soothing,calming love talk turns into violent outbursts, sometimes..trying to escape out of such outbursts leads into a numb period of silence,and you wait..and wait..and just wait...! your heart craves for something,and u do the exact opposite of it!
Relationships equals to Expectations! and there u go...end it! Expectations...too many to count, too many to comply to..'I need to/You have to be/I ought to/You have to/Come now/Call me now'...even if u dont want to,you have to..comply
ITS EXAM TIME NOW!
Question and answer round! never ending ones... 'Why? Where? When?Whose?What?'...the queries keeps pouring in and you have to answer..with explanation! monosyllable answers wont do, brief or theoretical explanation counts here..that ceases all your worries, cools down your temper,and in return u get a bigggg hug!! viva done,got ur marks,excellent score,time for a hug,and a quick sex to make up for the huge bouts of nerve wrecking questions!!

That Something,Someone called LOVE!!

A simpleton. A simple soul. A simple life. A simple being. A mere simple person. From a very simple small town,here's his story! He wakes up early morning at 6, finishing his chores, he does some yoga, takes his bath, he is a religious soul, he prays for an hour! he does meditation..eats his breakfast. Goes to college.Comes back home by evening. Checks his mails, attends few calls, watches tv silently, time for dinner, time to sleep! He doesn't mingle around with his friends, he doesn't have much friends to talk about. His life is simple, his life is just his own! Sounds pretty boring eh? but..he has a charm..when he talks, he is witty..when he is with me, he is adventurous..when he is naughty, and...he is a maniac..when we watches movies!
.....and i fell in love with that boring simple soul!

He came to The Big City..searching for a job, his resume was super cool,he was instantly hired by a well to do MNC. His work life began. Morning to evening working for life, working for the big bucks, working to make it big! And yes...big it was..pretty big!! And in that very big city,he found a new life...a life filled with friends, parties, late night outs, friends, alcohol, pubs, bars, shoppings, the nitty gritty of the big razmataz city life lured him,and he earned to make it big,to make it there..at the top! and boy! he made it really big!! He sounds interesting now? yes he does....
..... but,he didn't seem interesting afterwards! i searched for the charm..couldn't find! I searched for his humor..seems lost! he lost his adventurous streak...seemed like a man made machine! movies were replaced with computers and digits! the simpleton was replaced with an arrogant soul!
......and so, i started hating that big rejuvenated city guy!

.............and then...someone died...we cried.. we buried... we prayed.. we hugged...turned over..never to look back again....that someone, something..called LOVE!! 

HOUSE OF MEMORIES!!

A house where i have spend almost 2 and half years of my life.A house which i used to refer as our love den! I seldom hated travelling such a long journey from my own house to our love den! but then, there was always the attachment, the bond,the fulfillment and the ecstasy of spending days and nights with u...how time flies, how we have crossed those years,how we have survived those blissful years..and how you have gone out of my life..along with that house!
somewhere,i thought it was bound to happen,felt the same while bidding goodbye to the house for one last time,when you moved out of the house and shifted to another place...i knew somewhere, that along with the house,i too m finally bidding you goodbye..forever..from my life..it was just an irony to stay attached for few more months,but the end was then..there..at that moment..when i finally saw you coming down the terrace with your luggage from our love den!
But,even after almost more than a year of our separation from that love den,the smell of that house lingers in my nostrils, the moments that we have spend torments me sometime, i still cherish those love making sessions on the terrace,in your bedroom...the kitchen..where i had hugged you and hold you in my arms for the first time..all those seems to be a dream now...well..it has now remained a part and parcel of my past,in my dreams...to remain within me,for the rest of my life! Life moves on...i too, have moved on,so I dont miss your presence at all, but i do miss those wonderful moments that i have spend with you

Found out a long lost note that you had written about me..i guess so... :

"Came across another turning point of life..made a grt blunder of my life..but u wr der..u saved my life frm getting ruined..i had mistakn you..bt u came 2 me n drove away all my sorrows..excused my faults..once again i understd you,could feel you..a tear ws dropped dat took me more n more closer to you..yes der s an abstract entity called 'Relationship'--God's purest blesings..i had faith in it n still it's d same..its our own fault dat v cant see bt bein forced v blame on d right person..bt as tym passes d actual scene s revealed..Dear m sorry to d power of infinity..cant express dat how much m filled wid u..i swear..m soo glad dat m on my own now...its our life altogether..we two..yes i can deal with it better without any 'fake' support system which vanishes after a due course of time...but u r always there,and U will be..U and my parents..touchwood!!..love you..always....."

The smell of love...!!

It is said that every individual, every human being has their own smell,..the odor of their body (nah! i dont mean it in a bad way!), a specific scent of an individual that differentiates them from each other..Newborn babies and their mothers can identify each other by smell alone within hours of the birth. well, we have seen SCENT OF A WOMAN, wonder why nobody has ever made SCENT OF A MAN!! When u share a part of your life with someone, your loved ones, people you are more closer with,..you get acquainted with their body's odor..And..when u are in love,then it is this particular 'Scent' that strengthens your bond,your attachment..to that one specific person for the rest of your life..

So,

this is for you...

That lingering smell of yours,i cant help but breath in every time you hug me,you are with me..your sweat's specific "Scent" which gets me into the mood..and how it lingers in my memory when you are apart...!

and nope! its not your cologne or the perfume that excites me..because i have been practically in love with the smell of your sweat!! The scent of your sweat intoxicates me,at times..drives me crazy (too mushy?) well..maybe it's your pheromones (Which I have heard do not exist or that humans cannot detect them, but I still wonder!) :)

Traffic chaos in a metro!!

Recently,travelling on the way,suddenly one of my friend in an almost child like baritone exclaimed in ecstasy "Arre waah! dekho kitni saari gaadiyan khari hai,par kiyu?", then one of my other friend,her room mate (witty at her best!) answered sharply to her query "Dekh le acchi tarah, isko bolte hai TRAFFIC JAM!"......

so for those who have seen Anurag Basu's LIFE IN A METRO,trust me,that movie has shown nothing about the chaos of living in a metro coz undoubtedly the biggest,annoying and irritating part (scream aarrrgghh!!) of a metro are not the frizzle relationships (damn with your pyar mei dhoka, cheating on ur spouse,ditching ur partner...all those are primitive now!) ,but these annoying everyday ka 'jheloying' aspect of our lives..THE TRAFFIC JAMS! check...silk board, koramangala, bomanahalli to name a few! and...the metro rail constructions???? bhaiyya, hum to 5 saal pehle jaise thhe, waise hi thik hai! end it fast or kill it soon! god knows how long it will go on!!

Bebo's halkat jawani...!!

And so...the quintessential bollywood heroine's 'lip-biting' act..Perfect!! :-)

OMG! i have started liking Bebo! last i loved her in her 'Chammak Challo' moves (sp. that bharatnatyam jig),and now with 'halkat jawani',its those 'forbidden' expressions that gets full marks from me..Bang on!! the only other actress who was capable of these raunchy lascivious 'LIP-BITING' act was Madhuri Dixit,and Bebo did her job solidly and perfectly well..She's undoubtedly raunchy, perky, catchy and infectious swooning over 'Night ki naughty Kahaani, yeh Halkat Jawani....'

Anand and Kal ho na ho revisited..but charmingly!!

Loved Srijit Mukherji's latest outing HEMLOCK SOCIETY....but...A WORD OF CAUTION : Don't ever think of tagging along with someone who has had a heartbreak recently, to go watch this film,or don't even sit beside a broken heart while u watch this film...I went along with a friend of mine without realizing the same,that she broke off with her boyfriend few months back..and hey bhagwan! she sobbed and sobbed and sobbed!! :/ and i m pathetically bad in consoling people! that too in the middle of a movie!! that too inside the theater!! hello? oh! and no matter how far u go with ur words ("dont cry/it happens/life goes on/calm down babe/forget him, he was a jerk/ye,wo/la la la la/lu lu lu")..naah!! doesn't work..the sobbing continues!! and i wept too...for Parambrata...but nobody consoled me!! 

Thanks to Venkatesh Films for screening the film in bangalore,needless to say..it was worth all the wait! cries and laughter altogether..the satire wrapped in dark humour amidst romance with the tongue-in-cheek dialogues (sp. by Parambrata and Dipankar) makes it a completely entertaining flick!..Noteworthy are few dialogues that deserve applauds..eg; thr's this girl who goes out partying/hooking up every night telling her live in partner that his 'third grade male accessory' is not worth anymore ;-) (ah! how i wish i could say that!)

And finally, Bengali cinema has really come a long way,the usual chaotic howrah bridge has been finally replaced and quite stunningly by the hoogly bridge! special mention to the song sequences(splendidly choreographed "Ei to aami chai"!)

P.S. : this is the first time i have watched a Koyel Mullick film on the big screen and i wonder whats her height!!!??? coz she looks very much petite on the screen (upar se,she was wearing sandals!) nevertheless, loved her for the first time...finally her silly giggles have stopped! particularly,loved the smudged look and the nude lip shade she was wearing all throughout the film!

Eagerly waiting for Srijit Mukherji's next flick....